Communication is easier and quicker than ever, yet more and more people are feeling increasingly lonely.
Read slowly through these statements based on a list from Cigna’s website. Mentally check any that you relate to.
I have very few or no “best friends” who I feel that I truly connect with and can be
vulnerable with.
I have difficulty connecting with people on a deep level, and feel like a lot of my
interactions are on a surface level. Or maybe even the opposite, you feel like you can
only engage in deep, weighty conversations, and have difficulty relaxing and having fun.
I feel isolated no matter where I am, even surrounded by people.
I feel like I don’t belong or am not worthy of other people’s time. I typically experience
high levels of self-doubt.
I reach out to people, but I feel like people don’t reach out to me.
I feel like no one really sees or hears me.
I tend to feel exhausted after being social.
If some of these statements resonated with you, you may be struggling with loneliness. And you’re not alone!
Several studies have examined increasing rates of loneliness with the development and increased use of social media. Check some of these studies out in the references! One article even explains the contagiousness of loneliness; someone is more likely to be lonely if they are connected to another lonely person. Even if someone isn’t initially a lonely person, being around someone else who is lonely can prompt that shift.
If you have experienced loneliness, you can probably already guess that it isn’t very healthy. Socially, it can be very taxing and stressful to feel lonely. Physically, there are increased risks involved such as depression, heart disease, sleep disorders, and a plethora of other sucky effects.
But there is hope.
One option is always to talk to a professional. Consult with a doctor or therapist about how you have been feeling. There may be something going on beneath the surface, negative beliefs about life, yourself, or others, that you may not even know you have been holding onto.
Put yourself in places that prompt you to practice being social. Volunteering, small groups, and events are great places to get connected and practice connecting with others. It will be uncomfortable at first, but growth often is. Personally, I prefer social settings that involve activities that take some of the pressure off of holding a conversation, and allow the attention to be on something other than myself; board games and outdoor activities are some of my favorites.
Take care of your physical health. I cannot stress enough the importance of the link between our physical and emotional health. You will be amazed what regular physical activity, healthy eating, and sunlight can do for you.
Finally, my personal favorite option, connect with other people who may be feeling how you are feeling. No one can understand as well as someone who is right there with you. Committing to a relationship of encouragement and accountability with someone who understands and wants to grow, as you do, has the potential to be a life-changing experience.
1 lonely person + 1 lonely person = 2 less lonely people
You are not alone if you are feeling alone. More and more people are feeling just like you, and could benefit from a little bit more of you in their lives.
Resources
Beaton, C. (2017, February 23). The 2 reasons why so many people are becoming
lonelier. Psychology Today.
-so-many-people-are-becoming-lonelier
Coombs, B. (2020, January 23). Loneliness is on the rise and younger workers and social media
users feel it most, Cigna survey finds. CNBC.
Signs and symptoms of chronic loneliness. (2019, March). Cigna Official Site | Global
Health Service Company.
Other articles on social media and loneliness
Brown, L., & Kuss, D. J. (2020, June). Fear of Missing Out, Mental Wellbeing, and Social
Connectedness: A Seven-Day Social Media Abstinence Trial. International Journal of
Environmental Research and Public Health.
Nobel, J. (2018, December 21). Does social media make you lonely? Harvard Health.